Rambling Mid 20s

What is natural? is it perhaps the slithering of him inside? or is natural more… should natural be the easiness at which conversations occur/ or is it the way in which you don’t have to wonder about messing up/ being around too much.


I am a queen.

A queeen

of various boring proportions.

I am to be

admired but not patronized

my body held not scrutinized.

A long time ago a man told me that my body disgusted. I no longer react well to scrutiny. I would rather drown in many ways before allowing somebody to see me. I like better to be felt. what is the visual but the non-permanent anyway?

Don’t speak to much.

Don’t weight too much.

Don’t exist.

Don’t open your heart.

Don’t breathe.


Did you ever notice how behavior

is never free but is always under judgement.

What did school teach.

it taught to be okay with scrutiny.

It like the media, the boys, the adults

and how they limited us into behaviors.

humanity is but an organization of otherwise passionate behavior.

So we don’t feel. we act as though an action is to be calculated, judged by its counterpart response.

Don’t stop smiling.

Don’t cry.

Don’t crumble by the anxiety.

The voice

don’t look at anyone.

Mind. chill.





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