A week and a half just happened; it flew away from my grasp. That’s life, moments either feel eternal or they feel brusque. This week left me uncertain. I feel like I am in limbo waiting for the next step. What is the next step? Is it safe to stay with love? Or is love just a vile game?
You wait, do you stay despite the tears that fall from your eyes? You look at the boy, the one who took your heart. He is right there but yet he is so far from your reach. Let him take you. Let him make your body, his body. Hope he will love you now.
You hang low with the image of your mistakes. But as the week progresses you begin to see why you flew away. Did he ever ask you “What do you want today?”. Is he capable of putting down his own desires to please you? He doesn’t have to treat you like a princess, but does he treat you like a person with feelings and thoughts. Does he value even the dark thoughts that line the relationship?
Take a step back. remember writing about love. recall writing about events in a yellow light. You are not that girl anymore. you heart feels unsafe. The boy that the heart loves, has not done enough to put your guard down. Instead you hear, “My biggest fear was losing you”
“Yea, you ruined it.”
What do you do? But crumble into a state of nothing. You feel like nothing. Isn’t love supposed to make you feel grand? Are you anything? Is this love?
You are worthy. Deep down you hold that thought to your chest. ” I love you so much” You look at the mouth form the words, you hear the voice vibrate, and suddenly you are begging to stay together. Weeks pass, positives falter, and negatives amplify.