Flags, Roller Coasters, Romance is Dead

“Romance is dead” dead, gone, just not in the process, just not what I am seeking. Will you go out with me? Out with you? Why do you want me? I used to want someone. And then the feeling died. Can you not hold my hand? Where are my thoughts going?

Talking. About what? Please stop telling me about your binge drinking. I’m tired of ordinary nights with boys who talk of nothing. I’m tired of being a consolation prize. When will a guy just want to really know me, not for sex, but because they love my personality. It never happens. I must sound like a broken record of oh poor baby. You’re sad because people actually appreciate your beauty. I just want to find a connection to someone. 

I want a life roller coaster partner. Someone who makes me love life, who makes me see the beauty in life. Music must be a thing. They must have a passion for something. I want it all. Empty boys. Empty car rides. Emptiness is overrated. 

Flags like six flags. I was left alone by a boy in six flags yesterday. It was a flag that he was not the one. He attempted to make me leave. I didn’t. I just want to enjoy the feeling of flying. Don’t try to ground me. You don’t even know me. I said that before. To who? To a boy in an empty bed, who held me in his embrace. You don’t know me, and I walked away.

The flag that he is not the one:

1. His music taste stays within the safe

2. He only talks about drinking or smoking

3. He never talks about books 

4. He doesn’t talk about any underground tv shows

5. He doesn’t get my eclectic-ness

6. I don’t smile around him

7. He doesn’t make me laugh

8. He tries to hold on to me right away

9. It’s just a feeling that is either there or not.

Romance is dead. Curly haired boys just want to feel your body. They may even want to hear your words. But in the end they don’t want to be your friend. They have a goal. a happy end. Of you lying in their bed. Splat. Lame.

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